ここは唯一の真実を言える場所なら、
偏らずに自分の思いを全て言います。

If only this is the place where I can say the truth,
without any prejudice I will say everything I feel.

Monday, March 23, 2009

FIRST


It is monday, March 23rd 2009. 
The first day of school after a week of holiday. I woke up at 6 and wonder what I have been done in the past weeks. Slowly I put on my clothes and reminiscence my promises. The first reason why I went to school in the first place. I remember my undone promises, the promises that I have always broken all this time. I have always promise to be good at academics. 
When I was little my parents brought me toys and such and I always promise them.
That I will study hard, but the words are just like the wind. Passes by and not many care.

Even from the small monthly test to the big UPSR and PMR test. I always disappoint them.
This is the last year after 9 years of promises. I won't regret and I won't break any promises no more. There are always people who said to relax and have fun it's just a test. And they do it the same with SPM. No, I wont listen to those traps anymore. I will make my own phase from now on. And leave all those knaves behind.


After packing up I kiss my mom and wait for the carpool. I arrive at school and wait for my friends. After the morning assembly ends I went straight back to class. It is always like this, noises and teachers mumblings. The worst class perhaps, I mean never in history that almost all your teacher's explode.

I took a long glance at them while waiting the teacher to came in.
I have this hatred burning inside me, I felt like they were just a rain in my parade. I hate some of them, there are certain people who don't belong there. They have become a burden. Some of them have become a hand but some of them a just a weight holding me back so that I can't move forward.
Can't they see that winning is not easy.

The test results were handed in. My marks were horrid, but this feeling of hatred give me reason to move on and beat them to pieces. At some part we have to be selfish and So let it be, it is not the future to my caring. 

"I have scratch your back but you never scratch mine"


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