ここは唯一の真実を言える場所なら、
偏らずに自分の思いを全て言います。

If only this is the place where I can say the truth,
without any prejudice I will say everything I feel.

Thursday, December 2, 2010


It rains often here, it brings this sorrow feel to it but at the same time it drenched away pain. After it fades I went out for a jog, I wonder how far can I run without stopping. I felt that I am with the wind, clearing my mind as I go through. I've realized that it is almost a year now, it's december. Time flies, does it?

This year, I've seen myself and my friends were all facing difficulties and yet some of them are the opposites. Most of them having trouble with their current friends. Hypocrites to be specific. They have all stated their problems but I couldn't lend them a hand. Honestly, even at college I couldn't determine which are my friends and which are my foes. It's like the game of checkers, everyone is trying to eat each other. It's not that I hate them, it's just not the same friends that I used to have. Maybe I'm just being paranoid and not used to it. But realizing that everyone else suffers the same consequences.

I've been through a lot this year, like the roller coaster, I have gone through it's ups and downs and those twists you often don't like. I made some new friends at my college and also have made a lot of people cried this year, from tears of happiness to the despairs. I didn't realize that I was destroying precious things around me as I move. It hurts that is all that I can tell, surrounded by guilt. The most haunting feeling that you can have.

I still can't stop thinking. Figuring something I don't know off. It's like solving mathematical questions which includes infinite numbers. It drove me insane.

2 comments:

nblhmdn said...

another post of friendship, life and love :)

i agree with your point about the college friends are totally different from what we had in our high school days. maybe simply because everybody knows theyre racing to get good results and theres no point on finding friendship or creating those sweet memories and such, i dont know. ahaha

well yeah thats life and those obstacles and stakes we faced will be nothing but to teach us great lessons. arent they? it'll make us stronger and importantly, it makes us know ourselves better.

cheers to 2010!
an exit to a new beginning, a whole new page, :)

Enigma said...

cheers. ;)