ECSTASY

"My life is too short for me to accomplish all my ambitions."

-hagu-

Today, I spend most of my time preparing stuff for tomorrow. I help to make the script for the emcee, which partly Japanese. God, after rechecking the script, it sound so damn awkward. Blame my lack of skill in Japanese language. Then, me and Osyin decided to cut class and help our art teacher preparing Batik design as a token of our appreciation to the Japanese visitors. In that quiet room, we talked about many things. I don't know, lately I've been thinking about the future, talking about it, writing about it, trying to picture it. As we grow up, our state of mind changes, our view of life changes. In the real world, we will be bashed with thousands of more problems than we have now. Osyin decided to quit his ambition on becoming a lawyer, and go for easier job. Some still finding their own path.

My art teacher tells me the story of her life as a university student. It was horribly fun, I guess that's the right word for it.

Lately everyone have been losing focus, first I thought it was bad but it is common. I feel like everything will go perfectly. Sigh, I don't wanna blew it, or at least make it a failure with flying colours! I'm sure that everything will go perfectly!

NIPPON

It is the school custom to have visitors from Japan. Last year we have two Japanese high school students visiting our school. Anything that related to Japan is my biggest inspiration. It gives me that boost of willpower. From people, to Japanese events it gives me the greatest push. I felt unstoppable, optimistic and greatly isnpired when encountering something related to that country. Japanophilia is the word for it. So finally my ultimate inspiration arrive.

My art teacher and the principle had organize a meeting and demonstrations for the Japanese visitors. The teacher had given me an assignment to present to the visitors, hence I need to master normal Japanese conversations.That is why I borrowed Yas's Japanese grammar book to improve my Japanese Language skills.This year there will be 20 university students visiting our school. Such great number. I decided to draw Japanese Yokai's/ Ghosts for the visitors. I'd always dreamed to study abroad. So it might be a good chance to flatter them for scholarships and such. Anyways I hope this event will bring my optimistic self back. I need this.

REUNION

Today's episode of La Dolce Amira was definitely marked as my favorite moment. I watched it with my mother and she cried halfway through the show. Me, myself almost drop my manly tears. Today's episode is kind of like a flashback. All of the cast were forwarded to 4 years later. And they were having a reunion. The scene was so dramatic, sadness filled with melancholic tears. While watching, I try to put myself into the characters imagining what would I be 8 years later.

What so drastically sad is, anything can happen in 4 years time. Friendships broken, diseases take place and it was awful.

Things can change drastically in a short time, some successfully publish books from blogs, some from a punk to become a cafe owner, love, marriage, broken friendship, fatal diseases.

They were having a reunion which should have been a happy moment turn out to be bittersweet as they find out what happened to each other. So, anything can happen in the near future. There will be changes. I pretty much see how people will end up, mathee will go to Saudi Arabia to become a Pharmacist, Syara with the help of the british council, on the way to become a lecturer, but for me I just can't imagine myself perfectly in the future.

ORANGE

I took the personality test from one of the most legendary counselor, the experts of socials problems and minds.

I took it last week, and the result was announced at the teachers desk surrounded by other candidates who took the test. I scored major on the Orange rank. I am an orange person. Under the word orange, there is the caption 'Freedom'. So I decided to call these orange people, Freedom Seekers.

The counselor explained to me about that personality color. Although I am not in favor of everything that is written there but apart of me saying that it was true. The counselor said that this test had been tested by professional testers and it is true. Now that I knew half of my personality which I object a little, not from what I expected. I now declare myself as half of one of those Freedom Seekers.

THREAT

After searching Ramlee Awang's book at four different bookstore end up in vain, there is this one book that caught my eye. It is a mediocre book about history and love. I know it is better if I prepare for my trials and SPM but it doesn't hold that much of a threat to me. I felt like it was meaningless. But I will try my best, if only I had my old self back. I need something to push me forward.

TRANSVERSE

No, I'm not a transvestite. God, moms right, I need a girlfriend. Just so she can distract me from my desire's. But that's not the problem, the problem is I am too perfectionist. My taste of woman is high, to be certain until it reaches perfect. I judge beauty too detailed with no flaw. I know perfection doesn't exist in this world but my heart still searching the so called 'next best thing'.

MISSING

" True love is like a ghost, people always talk about it, few have seen it face to face."

Things were already at place but there is still one empty slot for the missing puzzle. The puzzle piece were everywhere, millions of them. But I can't find the one which fits onto this puzzle board.